Tradition is so overrated...

Well, it is that time of year again...Merry Christmas! (or is it Happy Holidays?) I'm not so sure that it really matters. (GASP!!) Yep, you did hear me correctly. If you tell me Merry Christmas, I will tell you Merry Christmas right back! If you say, Happy Holidays, I'll oblige. It's all good. The way I see it, both sets of words really mean, "I am so happy to be in your physical presence today. I'm enjoying spending part of my allotted time on this earth with you. At this particular moment, I am happy to share my joy with you!" In these tough times, it is hard enough to move beyond troubles into a place of joy. I'll take joy however it comes. I'm not the anti-Christmas, I promise you that. I'm just an independent. My story is both tragic and heartwarming, but it brings to light why I am so liberal when it comes to holiday terminology.

As a child, I spent most holidays at my Grandma and Grandpa's house. We lived on South 39th street. They lived on South 32nd. We did not travel far away, like my friends did. We rarely went farther than our own neighborhood for our family celebrations. My parents both worked in law enforcement, so shift work was required. Visiting other family in far away places was not practical. I don't recall ever tasting anyone else's dressing, casseroles or gravy until I was an adult. I didn't mind, though. My Grandma's cooking was the best! My Grandparents were gleefully involved in charity work. Every year at Christmas, we served because she served. She hosted parties for veterans, dressed dolls for young girls to receive and participated in a variety of other charitable endeavors. I was convinced she was one of Santa's elves until I was old enough to know better. There was no doubt in my mind what Christmas was all about when I was a child. Sometimes, I wish I could go back to the blissful innocence and joyful celebrations of my childhood.

Fast forward about 30 years and you will find my "Christmas Spirit" has changed as my life has unfolded. I am abundantly blessed with healthy children, a comfortable home, a great business with more work than I could possibly do, a great husband willing to stand by my side through good times and bad, an adorable cat and a loyal dog, and so much more! I love the Lord and am so grateful that I am set free from the bonds of my survival instinct and am allowed to transcend because His Son created a path for me to follow. Every day is a brand new adventure and I embrace that wholeheartedly! What I no longer embrace is the tradition of Christmas. I'm in no way discouraging taking time to specifically celebrate the wonder of our Lord humbling himself and walking among us as a shining light and laying down his own life so that we could be forgiven once and for all. As an anatomy and physiology aficionado, I marvel at the miracle of it all! I am glad that we all make a yearly plan to celebrate. I do agree that this season can be used to draw so many closer to the Lord. What I can not do is continue to force the traditions of yesteryear to fit my life. What I can do is EMBRACE. (I made that up myself.)

In my daily work, I've recently been dealing with depressed patients. Depression is a new therapeutic area for me and it has been both interesting and emotionally exhausting learning about the many factors associated with this debilitating condition. One theme that I've heard over and over is how the holidays exacerbate the symptoms of depression. Many people feel lonely, pressured and fearful of the implications of the holiday season. I've come to realize more and more that, in many instances, people are holding themselves and their lives to impossible holiday standards. The more I see it at work, the more I realize this has happened over the years in my own life. I am reminded of how many times over the years I have shed tears because I couldn't be with my children on Christmas because they were with their Dad. I've shed tears because my parents are divorced and there is an underlying guilt when one parent is excluded from a joyful family celebration. I've held my children as they spent their first set of holidays without their father after his tragic, unexpected death at age 32. Because of these experiences, I've come to a very important conclusion: NO ONE SHOULD BE HELD TO IMPOSSIBLE HOLIDAY STANDARDS IN THE NAME OF 'TRADITION!' Who's tradition is it, anyway? Tradition, in this case, is highly over-rated.

My mission during this holiday season is to be a peacemaker. I am not at all tied to anyone's tradition. We opened up our presents on Dec. 17th this year because it is OUR tradition to open gifts when all of my children can be together. I want to spend time with my friends and family without being bound by traditions that don't apply to us. I want to be close to my friends at work who are from all imaginable backgrounds. I want to be constantly aware that, when I am in the presence of another human being, I am in the presence of a soul and a miracle created by God! I want to laugh and experience joy during this special time that I have been gifted. So, to ALL of my friends and ALL of my family, Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays or just Happy Day! I am so very blessed to know you. Thank you for your friendship, support and love! When I see you, I will say something to convey my genuine affection for you. I want you to know that I want to love your soul like Jesus loves your soul just as much as I want to know you as an earthly human being. Whether I say Merry Christmas or Happy Holidays, know that the meaning is the same. I am happy to be in your presence today. Your presence is part of my present and that is a gift!

I will EMBRACE:

E mulate Christ when I'm not sure how to proceed.
M ove forward instead of dwelling on traditions that don't fit my life.
B e aware of how my words can affect those around me.
R emember the sacrifice that Jesus Christ made for me.
A ccentuate what is positive and joyful!
C hoose to love no matter what.
E liminate negativitiy so that those around me can experience the fullness of Christ!

HE has given us ETERNAL LIFE and this life is HIS SON. 1 john 5:11 NLT